Resisting and Clinging

Isn't it interesting how we so readily jump on the merry go round of resisting and clinging? Can we not just BE? Ah such is the human condition. I have been on this merry go round a few times and the best way I know to get off is to go to AA!!  AWARENESS and ACCEPTANCE. We can’t change anything without the awareness that it is actually going on, so that is the first step.  Becoming aware of what you are resisting and what you are clinging to in itself will give you a lot of freedom, but the suffering part is only eradicated by acceptance of what is.  Acceptance of the present moment and all that that entails; the good, the bad, the challenging and the ease, it just IS.  We generally resist and cling based on our own perception of how things “should” be, either in the past, present or future.  We need to remember that WE created these perceptions in our own minds based on our own experiences.  But that does not mean that they have to remain our reality; we can change these perceptions any time we want.  I am not saying that if we do we will never again resist or cling; I have been around long enough to know that as well! But I also know from my own experience that we can significantly decrease the amount of energy we expend on it.  A little self examination may be in order to understand why we are triggered by certain people, things and events.  For example, one thing that always triggers me is boredom.  I seem to have created the perception that I need to be busy all the time, so when I am not, I begin resisting it. I start trying to control things, filling my time with meaningless projects/events hoping that it will make me feel better.  Well guess what? It doesn't!  When I checked in with myself I realized that I had created this perception in my childhood, where there was always an expectation that you should be DOING something (as is the case in many Western culture families and I am sure I have given my own children this burden to bear!).  Many of us feel unproductive, lazy, bored, like we are bad people just because we are doing nothing (one day I will share my thoughts on the art of doing nothing).  As is always the case once I became AWARE of this thought pattern and then understood it, I was free to ACCEPT it.  No more resisting . . . for now!  The same works for clinging, I've been there too, wanting to hang onto a feeling, a person, an event. I think the most important thing to remember is that the harder we try NOT to do something, ie. resisting or clinging the more it persists and the more grief it sends our way,  that’s why the practice of awareness and acceptance is so important.  In my experience it is the only way! Maybe one day it will become my natural way of being, until then I will keep going to AA!! Hope to see you there :)