Resentment and "keeping your power"

I can often be heard telling my friends “take back your power”.  What this means for me is not allowing someone else to affect how I feel.  It can be recognized when you find yourself blaming, complaining, frustrated, resentful, sad or mad. I know this but it is still a work in progress for me. This past weekend I received another example of how I had let go of my own power and the affect it had on me. . .  and it was not pretty!! LOL

I will go back to my words on “choices” we need to remember it is always our choice to make.  I had been feeling for weeks that I needed some time to myself for recharging, but I allowed the responsibilities in my life and my family to prevent me from taking this much needed time out.  I was also expecting someone else to respond to my needs in the way I would respond, this was a big lesson in frustration. I had given up my power.  I was no longer in control of my own life.  I was becoming resentful, angry, frustrated and having difficulty seeing this clearly.  The result was an explosion of epic proportions! But afterwards I felt much better.  The air had been cleared, the eyes opened up and a letting go had occurred. While my goal is to prevent these types of explosions, I am not beating myself up about this one.  I said my apologies to the people affected and feel I learned a valuable lesson on my threshold of tolerance. Sometimes we need to experience our lessons not just sing them. I liked what my “oh so wise” daughter said to me that night after the blow out. “Mom you are not a victim in this, you know what you need to do for yourself”. She is so right, if you are feeling like a victim, feel like you have no control or are looking to someone or something outside yourself to fix this for you then you have given up your power.  Take it back now!  There is always a choice to make.  Now when a friend of mine is late, I prevent resentment by saying “if you are not here by (a specific time) I will leave and we will have to reschedule”, or instead of feeling hurt because a friend has monopolized the conversation, I will say “can we get together I really need someone to talk to”. If I needed a time out what I needed to say was “I’m sorry if you can’t get away at this time, I will take a few days to myself now and then we can plan some time away together when you are free”. There is always a choice to make that meets your need for peace of mind and contentment and allows you to keep your own power, look for it always. You do no one any favours by building up resentment and frustration and it will most likely show up in inappropriate ways (trust me on this one).  So take back your power today, when you feel that little bit of resentment creeping in or feel anger rising up or hear yourself saying, he/she should have, these are your warning signs. STOP. Prevent resentment now. Make the right choice for YOU!

 

I did end up with some time away. . .

to just ENJOY! -Revelstoke, BC