Why do we allow what others do or say to affect how we feel?

This week a friend sent me this quote. How many of you have ever considered this and do you think there is any truth to it?  I find myself quite aware of it in other people, so when I am blaming someone or mad at them for some reason I try to figure out what it is about for me, but it isn’t always easy.  Some times it’s easier to blame than to look deep within oneself. I remember complaining to a friend years ago that my husband didn’t value my contribution to the family.  She said to me are you sure that you value your own contribution?  At the time of course I thought I did, but years later looking back I’m going to say no I did not.  I have found that quite often when I have allowed other peoples words or actions to affect how I feel; it is because of my own insecurities.  One strategy that has worked for me is realizing that everyone is on their own path in this life and we are all doing the best we can with what we know at the time.  For the most part, people aren’t out to “get you” (with some exceptions).  They are simply going about their own life doing what they need to do and say for themselves.  So why would we take anything they did or said personally?  Can we have compassion for them without making it about us? Can we listen with an unbiased heart? Or at the very least can we just let it go? In those times when it has worked for me (still a work in progress), I have found great freedom in not being affected by others words or actions. If we could all be successful at this, it would allow each of us to keep our own personal power which is an important component of building good self esteem.  Take some time this week to pay attention to the words and actions of others that have a deep impact on you, both good and bad.  Is there something about yourself that needs to be healed? Needs to be opened up? We can learn a lot about ourselves by our reactions and only in this awareness will we be able to change it.  I would love to have your feedback on this always interesting topic.  Send me some comments!!