Your TRUTH is YOUR truth.

I follow author Jeff Brown on Facebook (facebook/soulshaping) and today while reading one of the comments on his post I was inspired to reply.  What inspired me was a need to clarify for us all, that one person’s truth in this moment in time is their truth alone.  Having the courage to share their experience through words, photos, painting, singing, dancing should not be judged based on our own perception. These “sharings” (not really a word, but I like it) are meant to be an expression of someone’s life journey and we need to appreciate that.  Can we voice our own opinion, agree or disagree, share our own experience of a similar thing?  Absolutely! But do we have the right to suggest that another person should change their own truth to suit our needs? Absolutely not! Such is the beauty of art in all forms, some of us respond to certain things and others to different things.  As a writer, I write from my heart what is my truth and my own experience.  My goal is to share with you in the hope that something I say may help you along your own personal life journey.  But I know there are lots of people who will not understand, or “get” what I am saying.  There are also lots of people who will flat out disagree and that’s okay.  I love that there are so many people out there sharing their stories, it is what helps me to learn and to grow.  We all process information in different ways and understand meaning at different times, that’s why you can pick up a book and not be able to get into it and two years later it is life changing for you. Or someone says something over and over (so true in yoga) and finally it just clicks.  Isn’t this great?!  It speaks to our ability to grow and learn.  The important part is that we remain open, open to receiving what we need at the time.  Allow what resonates to settle in and let go of what does not.  And maybe just maybe what does not resonate will come back to you later and you will say “ah. . . I get why I could not see that before”.  Now that is progress and isn’t that what this is all about?

Spiritual Evolution

I just spent the weekend with my Aunt and as always we had many wonderful conversations about life, love, relationships and personal growth.  She introduced the words “spiritual evolution” into one of our discussions and it quickly became our go to phrase.  We can become so focussed on how we are different from others and see them as separate from us.  But the reality is we are all connected through our energy source and while we may be at different points in our spiritual evolution we are all still the same. At a recent meditation retreat I attended the teacher made the statement that when we look with our eyes (at others) we see only differences, these can be physical, mental and emotional attributes, but when we close our eyes and look with our hearts we are all the same.  As I sat in that room of 40+ people I tried it and he was right!  Now when I catch myself looking at someone and seeing differences I close my eyes and look with my heart.  Regardless of our culture, our bank account, our clothes, our car, we all want to be happy, to love and be loved, to be safe and healthy and to live our life fully.  The truth is when we are living from our authentic self we attract others into our life that are part of our path, regardless of where we are in our spiritual evolution at that time.  And as each one of us continues to evolve, people and situations will come and go as our energy shifts.  This may be the answer to why it is so difficult for many of us to “let go”.  When we understand that all of our experiences and relationships become part of our evolution then we can let go and move forward. The fact is that evolution is part of universal law, there is no use fighting it we need to embrace it.  Be okay with change, let go of what we need to, be open to what comes to us, feel instead of think our way and allow our spiritual evolution to unfold in its own unique beautiful way.

Namaste – The divinity in me honours the divinity in you.

Change and Flow.

There is nothing more certain in life then change, other than death and taxes (hehe)! The trick I am finding on dealing with all of the changes in my life is flow.  We can so easily get caught up in the trap of trying to fight change, fearing change, waiting for change or desiring change that we lose sight of the reason for change.  Change is growth; if nothing ever changes it is also never growing.  Just take a look around you, in nature everything is always changing and growing, in the world of science there are always new discoveries, technology is ever changing and growing (like it or not), we as a human species are changing and growing (in some parts of the world more so than others, sadly). So why our love hate relationship with change?  One of the big things is definitely fear, when something changes the outcome is unknown and there is nothing we hate more then uncertainty as it challenges our safety.  This fear manifests itself as control, we try and control the situation, the person, the event, which only causes us a huge amount of suffering and most times does not lead to the outcome we are so attached to anyway. Another thing that holds us back from making changes is courage, the courage to stand up to the unknown and have faith that we will be okay.  The courage to trust our own intuition, to do what is best for ourselves and the greater good, or to step outside the “norms” of society.  Courage can be cultivated one small step at a time, but we often think we need to take a REALLY big step before we are ready and this keeps us paralyzed.  And so the struggle continues . . . . we are either fighting against change or endlessly wishing for it.  I think the answer lies in  “flow”, which I always picture as a creek; the water continues to move along the creek bed, rolling over rocks, around trees, providing nourishment for plants and animals and playing its own song. No matter what challenges are thrown in its path, sometimes it is overflowing, sometimes it is just about dry, sometimes it gets damned up by debris or man, but through it all it continues to flow in its own way on its own path.  There is no fear, no lack of courage, it just is.  So if we take a page from the creeks book, then no matter what changes life gives us or if we chose to make those changes on our own,  life will go on.  It may be rough, it may seem insurmountable at times, it may be blissful and without a doubt there will be someone or something that tries to dam us up, but through it all if we just allow the experience of  change to wash over us, to accept it and flow with it, we will significantly reduce our suffering.  We can provide nourishment to others by saying “we are okay with change because we welcome growth”,  and we can sing a song of hope for the many who remain stuck in their patterns of fear and control.  Together we flow through life like a creek, ever changing, ever growing, enjoying the ride!

Sharing our Gifts.

This past weekend I attended a Buddhist meditation retreat on Dream Yoga it was amazing! I had not sat with a teacher for a few years and it was great to receive the wisdom and teachings.  I will admit I went into it a little hesitantly as I had not sat and I mean literally "sat" (you sit for long periods of time in Buddhist meditation practice) for quite awhile.  I am happy to report that I had no problems at all with 9 hours (total, not in a row) of "sitting". All of my trepidation was dispensed when Geshe YongDong began teaching, I was so fascinated and eager to practice I forgot about my physical body pain. (Although I did indulge in nightly epsom salt baths!!) 

By the end of the weekend I was fully aware of why I attended this retreat and had definitely received what was meant for me.  So grateful for this!  I am sure you will all receive my interpretation of these teachings through my blog posts as time goes on, but I did want to share one thing that struck me about the retreat.  It became obvious during the discussion time that each participant was at a different point on their spiritual journey (which I also call my life journey as I feel it is one and the same).  It was interesting how one person would ask a question and when the Geshe did not fully understand it another person would try and "interpret" it for him in a different way hoping it would assist him.  Because of this process I believe everyone was able to squeeze just a little more out of the teachings.  It also made me realize that the wisdom and knowledge that I have is very valuable as is the wisdom and knowledge of everyone.  We never know when our way of saying something will resonate with another and help them on their life journey.  I have always been a believer that everyone needs to find their own way to fulfillment, but I also know that we each have a unique way in which we say/view/see/understand things.  Many times the Geshe would say "this is how I see it, or this is how I understand it, maybe that works for you, maybe it doesn't" but the fact was that he was sharing it and I appreciated that and got from it what I needed (based on the point that I am at).  Speaking my truth and uncovering my authentic self has been a journey for me and is a big reason why I started this blog.  I have definitely come a long way which I am grateful for and happy that this weekend reinforced to me why I need to continue on this journey.  I am using my gift as a writer to share my experiences with you, maybe you will find them helpful or maybe you won't. Maybe you will re read different posts and find new meaning in them or maybe you won't. Either way you are here and present which means you are on the path and interested,  which I so appreciate and honor. With that in mind, if at any time you would like to ask me a question or run something by me that you are struggling with, I will do my best to share with you what I know (email tracyswisdomtree@gmail.com). Maybe it will help you and maybe it won't, no attachment :).  

Thanks for the teaching Geshe YongDong! 

Visit Geshe YongDong’s Tibetan Bon Buddhist Centre’s website at: www.sherabchammaling.com

Thanks to Yoga MCC for hosting this event.

www.yogamcc.com

Lesson learned!

This past week I was faced with a challenging situation that caused me to react and want to strike back.  Fortunately my body awareness alerted me to this when I felt a gripping sensation in my belly.  I was also able to discuss it with a friend who let me vent and offered me some good wisdom.  In my reactive state I said "I feel that she does not value my integrity" to which my friend replied "no Tracy its not YOUR integrity that she doesn't value, she doesn't value INTEGRITY at all". Wow thanks!  This allowed me to not take the matter personally, it also allowed me to see that I had a choice as to whether or not I wanted to do business with someone who did not value integrity. It was then up to me to decide if I wished to continue a business relationship that did not align with my values.  I was able to make this decision not out of anger and frustration but from a choice I made a few years ago to only do business with people who valued my services, paid a fair price for them and that I liked as a person. I know that if I had made the decision in my anger state I would have beat myself up about it later.  I would have thought I could have said something differently, or been more accommodating and on and on.  Because I was able to take a step back and figure it out I was able to respond (not react) with an appropriate action.  I also realized that in the past when I had been too accommodating and then faced my own wrath, it was because I was trying to "force" the outcome by having the other person see it my way.  Then when they did not I would feel as if I had done something wrong.  Crazy!  Oh the stories we tell ourselves!!  So thankful for this lesson and all of my lessons. . . .just wanted to share :)            

Heart Thinking

Most spiritual traditions teach about the duality of the human condition, the reality that you are not your thinking mind, and that the real or authentic you resides in your heart.  Every day along my own spiritual journey I become more and more aware of this reality.  As I learn to quiet my mind in meditation and listen to my heart I become more at peace and less likely to get caught up in my emotions, so I feel like I have a pretty good grasp on the whole listening to my heart thing.  I have had many experiences that have shown me that my happiness is dependent on me following my heart not my mind. However, I continue to have challenges quieting my mind and stopping the obsessive thinking in my everyday life. The other day when I became very aware of this fact I thought wouldn't it be great if all of our "thoughts" could come from our heart instead of our mind.  I don't mean the intuitive answers that come as a result of our meditation practise or other forms of surrender, I mean our every day thoughts.  We all know and the psychological research will prove that our minds obsessive thoughts are mostly negative, but the thoughts that come from our hearts are positive.  If this was possible we could change the "mind thoughts" from "your not enough, you need to work harder, they don't like you, your not good looking enough, your not smart enough, to the "heart thoughts" of "you are fabulous just the way you are, you are loved, you will always be happy, you are successful, you are gorgeous, you have so many gifts to offer". Wouldn't it be a wonderful world if everyone "thought" with their heart instead of their mind? Now I know this is a lofty goal, and some people will call me a Polly Anna, an idealist, a crackpot or even crazy, and that's okay.  I know that no real change or growth has ever come from staying and/or "thinking" inside the box.  The limits need to be pushed, and I am always happy to push them. Are you? Would you be willing to commit to a regular meditation practise? Or take daily walks in nature? What about sitting in a beautiful garden for 30 minutes a day? Or maybe practise Yoga or Tai Chi? How about using your creative ability to paint, draw, sing, play, write?  All of these things lead to connecting with your heart with your true self.  They also lead to a feeling of connection with the rest of humanity and that says to me that if we change our own behaviour we are actually changing the world. So if you are a little bit crazy like me and want to do your part to contribute to change lets all give it a go!  The Heart Thinking Movement is born!

 

**I wrote this post last night and this morning I happened upon this teaching from the Dalai Lama and thought it was fitting to share on this post**

 

"Changes in the world come from individuals, from the inner peace in individual hearts.  Just as ripples spread out when a single pebble is dropped into water, the actions of individuals can have far-reaching effects"

Mindfulness – Tracy Style

It has been 6 years since I took my first Mindfulness Meditation course and I am finally starting to understand what “mindfulness” really is.  It goes to show you how every step along this journey of life is really just a stepping stone to the next one!  All of the information that I have gathered over the years has finally settled into my body and mind and allowed me to feel it on a deeper level.  I am so grateful for every teacher I have had along the way.  I wanted to share this experience with you for many reasons but not the least of which is – don’t give up!  Keep at it, keep reading, keep researching, keep listening and keep doing.  You never know when it will settle into YOUR heart and that moment could be just around the corner.  

                                                           Here is my story . . .

When I first started practicing mindfulness meditation we were taught to watch our thoughts, pay attention to our breath and scan our body.  As a newbie I did all of this and felt quite competent at it, little did I know at the time that I was doing all of this from an intellectual viewpoint (from my head).  The next step during our “training” was to be mindful of everyday experiences, ie. mindfully brushing our teeth, mindfully eating our food, mindfully washing the dishes, etc.  Again I did all of this and again I felt quite competent (I am an overachiever!).  I continued my practice and watched my thoughts, I started labeling them and did end up learning a lot of things about myself and my belief’s and was able to make changes that brought me much happiness.  Over the next few years, my meditation practice came and went, but I continued to be interested and continued to study; reading, doing yoga, discussing and reflecting.  I look back on this part of my life and see that I was kind of coasting, enjoying my new found happiness and allowing it to settle in.  But as is always the case during these “transition” phases of the journey eventually the newness wears off and we need to proceed to the next phase.  I  was in a bit of denial about moving on, I was having a good time, pushing the limits, living life to the fullest, but something was missing and I knew that at the deepest part of myself. With some help from my coach I came back to the practices that I knew would bring me the peace and answers I was seeking.  I began a regular meditation practice again, but this time it felt different.  This time I wasn't doing it from an intellectual place; I was doing it from my heart.  I had learned the proper techniques, now it was time to put them into action for a different reason.  Very quickly I began to see many benefits, clearer thinking, deep listening, peaceful, grounded and much less likely to get caught up in my emotions.  After six months of strict regular practice all of my experience was put to the test as I faced the end of my 25 year marriage and all of the decisions that needed to be made around that as well as many decisions relating to changes in my business. Through all of this I managed to maintain the same clear thinking, the deep listening and the peaceful grounded feeling.  I started to see that being “mindful” was really about being “aware”, being the silent observer of my life and myself.  As each challenge was thrown at me I became an observer of my emotions.  I watched my reactions, I watched how it felt in my body, I didn't judge it, I didn't try and analyze it, I just allowed it.  And when it passed over (as it always does) the decisions and answers became easy – it was the path of least resistance.  This doesn't mean that I didn't have moments of frustration, sadness, anger and fear, I absolutely did!  But I did not allow them to take over, by seeing and acknowledging that I had a right to all of these feelings and by knowing that they would pass, I was able to accept them on a level I had not been able to in the past.  Going through something very difficult or stressful is often what pushes us to surrender.  I could succumb to the overwhelming emotions or I could surrender to “myself” to the present moment, to what I knew deep inside.  I had learned to trust the knowingness of my soul and I knew that everything would work itself out just the way it needed to.  This experience is open to every one; you just need to open up to it.  Open your mind, open your heart, be mindful, watch for opportunities and then make a choice.  Choose you, choose what best serves you and the higher good, and choose what feels right deep in your heart.  Bringing peace into your own heart brings peace into the world. Together we can make a difference. . . . one “mindful” peaceful heart at a time!